It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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