I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
