Too much gin, very little bucket
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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