His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
