Whoa Z and x make the same sound
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
