oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize