yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize