My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
