I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Randomize
