How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
