I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize