Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize
