Kiss
Puke
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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