Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
