sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Randomize
