i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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