i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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