Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
This house was built for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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