Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
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