So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
then he tried to convert me to islam
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
