whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
