I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
