You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
