Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
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We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
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Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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