I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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