i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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