Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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