my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Church boner. Awkwardddd
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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