just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
