Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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