areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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