The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
