marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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