If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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