Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Randomize
