And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
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We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
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Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.