they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize