She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
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