Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
