It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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