YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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