Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
