i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
