someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize