whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I'm eating all of the evidence.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
My liver just had a heart attack.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
