Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
