You're earring is so big in my mouth
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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