I could have mohawked her pubes.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Randomize
