We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
