You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
