Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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